Great article. I think the advice I would have wanted most (my twin boys are 27 now) is to relax and allow your children to grow into the larger humans they are destined by your DNA to be. Our job as parents is to keep our children alive until they are able to protect themselves and launch. That doesn't mean there are no lessons for them to learn from us. But it does mean we should drop the whole shaping narrative. They have a shape already - like a fractal. They just need to discover it and grow into it. Other than DNA, I think the evidence suggests the single biggest determinant of outcomes is the peer group at school. That can make a difference and it is worth the effort to try to get that right.
I've had personal struggles with communication and constantly improving it to this day. Parenting isn't just with the child. It changes the dynamics between spouse with a little one or more. I do think that communication alone is tied in with adaptability and emotional intelligence as understanding and managing emotions are key to effective communication.
I had to improve my internal dialogue and understand my thoughts and emotions, it's kinda trippy.
The growth for me is building strong relationships, new and old.
Great article. I think the advice I would have wanted most (my twin boys are 27 now) is to relax and allow your children to grow into the larger humans they are destined by your DNA to be. Our job as parents is to keep our children alive until they are able to protect themselves and launch. That doesn't mean there are no lessons for them to learn from us. But it does mean we should drop the whole shaping narrative. They have a shape already - like a fractal. They just need to discover it and grow into it. Other than DNA, I think the evidence suggests the single biggest determinant of outcomes is the peer group at school. That can make a difference and it is worth the effort to try to get that right.
I've had personal struggles with communication and constantly improving it to this day. Parenting isn't just with the child. It changes the dynamics between spouse with a little one or more. I do think that communication alone is tied in with adaptability and emotional intelligence as understanding and managing emotions are key to effective communication.
I had to improve my internal dialogue and understand my thoughts and emotions, it's kinda trippy.
The growth for me is building strong relationships, new and old.